Ricki Lake opened up about the tragedy of losing her ex-husband Christian Evans in a new interview.
The 50-year-old star revealed that she suffered 'true depression' after Evans killed himself in 2017 and has only recently recovered.
The former talk show maven shared her experience in dealing with the loss and admitted that living with her ex was a struggle as he began to exhibit signs of bipolar disorder.
'It was like living with Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde,' Lake explained. 'I wanted to save him, but I couldn't.'
Lake married Evans in 2012 and divorced in 2015 but she said stayed close with her ex in many ways.
'I was still supporting him,' Ricki said, 'financially and emotionally.'
His death two years after their divorce was an emotional blow for the actress and she struggled to cope with the loss.
'For a long time, I didn't think I'd ever feel happy again,' she admitted to the magazine.
Since losing Christian, Ricki has been open about her struggles with depression and deep sadness, regularly posting images of the pair on social media and sharing her feelings with fans.
Earlier this month, on what would have been their seventh wedding anniversary, Ricki shared a touching collection of images on Instagram.
'After Christian passed away on 2/11/17,' she wrote. 'I found among his things that he had saved a draft of his wedding vows to me.
'He only had one sentence on the page, "I vow to continue loving you." Those words are perfect as a reminder that he is always with me and loving me wherever he is, and also a reminder to always love myself.'
Ricki had Christian's friend and tattoo artist ink the words, in his own handwriting, on her forearm.
This was all part of the mother of two's healing process.
'I got to experience true depression,' she told People. 'There were days when I couldn't get out of bed, and that is a very scary place to be.
Adding: 'I'm such a positive person, and to not feel like that was paralyzing.'
The last project they worked on together, the documentary Weed The People, became a deeply personal project for Ricki.
The film follows families who treat their children's cancer with medical cannabis and Lake called it Evans' 'legacy.'
'I will mourn the loss of Christian's beautiful soul every day of my life,' Ricki touchingly said to People. 'But human beings are resilient. And life is precious.'